sensemaking i (ft. The Answers in Between)

from boundarypush by Wren Dove Lark

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about

It's so crazy this song idea initially started out as like far more stomp-hey indie folk before I created this really weird instrumental with lots of fun breaks and chip tune-y synths and somehow it finally came together and made sense as a song. I was SO blessed that Hannah (The Answers In Between) vibed with the song and was willing to feature on it bc her verse adds SO much to the song's vibe of being overwhelmed by not knowing yourself especially as a trans person. It is SO awkward trying to go through all the steps, usually in front of the world, of gradually reaching closer to how you want to present yourself. Our goal was to create an homage to that really confusing time.

lyrics

[Verse 1: Wren Dove Lark]

Senses overloaded
I've received too much input in this state
Endless permutations
Overwhelmed by this world of me you made

I see a thousand harsh realities in the moment
I see a thousand new catastrophes oncoming
I hear a thousand different voices in my head
I wish you'd make them go quiet

And I try
But I don't know what I'm doing
And I go
But I'm so scared to go through it

Awkward attempts at every iteration
Of any version of myself that could elicit an escape from
This liminality of thinking and wanting and being what you can't describe
Besides

[Chorus: Wren Dove Lark]

You try a name that don't stick
Grow out your hair and think that'll do the trick
You buy some shoes that don't fit
Put on a dress and say
"Chief, nah this ain't it"

You give up and watch your face turn red
As you wade into bed
Slowly sinking into a depression

Get mad at how it's so unfair
Being stuck in despair
Only left with the question

How do you make it make sense
When you don't know yourself enough just yet?
How do you make it make sense
When you don't know yourself enough just yet?

How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?

[Verse 2: The Answers in Between]

And it takes forever
Finding other girls of a feather
You find a safe place from all the noise
Drowning out the sound of your inner voice

But when you finally listen
You know that it's different
From everything that you were supposed to know
You moved hell and heart so you never let show

I see a thousand miles between everyone that I love
A thousand well meaning cis friends asking me what's wrong
Think it's a million people telling us we don't belong
Then the mask comes off and they just want us gone

Shouldn't have to spend so long on the edge
Retreating deeper and deeper and deeper into your head
Then you make yourself real but need to prove you exist
I'm sick of persistence, fuck this resistance
Just make it make sense

[Chorus: Wren Dove Lark and The Answers in Between]

You try a name that don't stick
Grow out your hair and think that'll do the trick
You buy some shoes that don't fit
Put on a dress and say
"Chief, nah this ain't it"

You give up and watch your face turn red
As you wade into bed
Slowly sinking into a depression

Get mad at how it's so unfair
Being stuck in despair
Only left with the question

How do you make it make sense
When you don't know yourself enough just yet?
How do you make it make sense
When you don't know yourself enough just yet?

How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?

[Bridge/Outro: Wren Dove Lark and The Answers in Between]

How do you make it make sense
To a boy without a reference?
How do you make it make sense
To a girl without a precedent?

How do make it through the prejudice?
How do you step off of the precipice?
How do you learn to love the nebulous, incredulous, and perilous?

How do you make it make sense
When you don't know yourself enough just yet?
How do you make it make sense
When you don't know yourself enough just yet?

How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?
How do you make it make sense?

credits

from boundarypush, released February 9, 2024
Writing and vocals as credited in "lyrics" box by Wren Dove Lark and The Answers in Between

Mastering assistance by The Answers in Between

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all rights reserved

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about

Wren Dove Lark image

Wren Dove Lark Newark, New Jersey

I'm Wren (she/her). I write weird pop music for trans girls to cathartically cry to. If others get something from my music, that's awesome too. :)

Free Palestine 🇵🇸

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